Giving Thanks

From the worst blogger on the planet. I suck at life. This is why.


Well, school has been busy (with 14 boys, ya know!). Pregnancy has been brutal (finally felt better two weeks ago at 21 weeks!). We have been especially busy preparing for Noah, and have some new updates (which I am trying to view positively - see below!), but I thought I would take the time to participate in the 25 Things I Am Thankful For list that is so popular. Technically you are supposed to list one per day for the whole month of November until Thanksgiving, but I am a slacker. So here goes.

1. I am thankful for my McSexy, who gave me this cute little baby boy and without whom, I never would have survived this pregnancy (or the last one). Or at least I would not have eaten, showered, cleaned house, walked the dogs, etc. for the last five plus months. He is a saint. Say-aint. Saint.

2. I am thankful for my cute little Noah who looks just like daddy. I am thankful that he is finally tolerating vegetables, kicks me regularly every night and that he has continued to grow and fight. Thank you, Baby.

3. I am thankful for the medical advances that caught my complete placenta previa BEFORE labor (which would not have been good, no no). Even though my condition has actually worsened, I am thankful that we have c-sections to get my little man out safely, thankful for specialists that know how to recognize and treat my complications, thankful for the NICU where Noah will likely spend his first few weeks. Without modern medicine, Noah and I would both be dead by March. So, I am thankful.

4. Even though no one wants a preemie and I am hoping he stays in until 34 weeks (when they drag his poor, unprepared body out, waaaaaa), I am thankful that I at least get to meet Noah earlier than expected. Would I prefer he stay in there to term? Yes. But trying to find the positive, people!

5. I am thankful for amazing insurance that has covered and will cover all of our medical expenses. I pray for those that face health complications with poor or no insurance. You can see how it can absolutely destroy people.

6. I am thankful for my job, which has been nothing but accommodating, flexible, understanding and comfortable with ambiguity throughout my whole pregnancy. I am lucky to work in a school that believes so strongly in children and families that they actually adhere to their convictions in their employment policies, regardless of what it means for them financially or otherwise. I am thankful to work in a place of integrity.

7. I am thankful for my munchkins and parents, who are so supportive each and every day. My kiddos LOVE Noah (write him love notes, sing to him, read to him, fiercely protect him) and my parents rush to help me out in any way they can. I am thankful to be part of such a wonderful community. And my kids are hilarious. Seriously. What kids think about how my pregnant belly is going to get so big that it curls around itself? And ponder how will I be able to run with a curly belly. Seriously.

8. I am thankful for my friends and family who are already planning (or changing their plans!) to help me out during my impending bed rest at 27 weeks! We have been offered meals, house cleaning, visits, books, etc. It makes things less overwhelming knowing we have so much help if we need it!

9. I am thankful that MS and I both have good, stable jobs, especially in this time of unemployment and financial upheaval. Thank you, GOD!

10. I am thankful for a warm house and good food. So many do not have either of these things, and I think we take them for granted much of the time. I do anyway. Especially now that it is snowing outside and I am particularly hungry (ALL. THE. TIME), I am thankful for shelter and meals.

11. I am thankful for my education that has allowed me to be in a career that I think will make me that much better of a mother. My degrees are in little people. It has to help, right?

12. I am thankful to have a husband that has a similar parenting philosophy as I. I am thankful that he is interested in birth, and attachment, and breastfeeding and freely reads these books to be better prepared for our baby. I am glad that he will be there to advocate for Noah and what we feel is right even if I am slightly incapacitated at first. Noah, you are a lucky little man!

13. I am thankful for my puppies, who are angels and precious and the biggest cuddle bugs in the whole wide world. Thank you, God, for sending me these particular dogs, who are a perfect fit for Jason and I and who we love so deeply. They make our lives more entertaining and lovely each and every day. Wuv my widdle doggies.

14. And my ratty girl. Who is highly entertaining and eternally patient as her life is threatened daily by 20 kinders. Best. Rat. Ever.

OMG, HOW MANY MORE????? Snap. Ok, we are going to get quick and random and trivial.

15. Thankful for Eggnog Lattes. Yes I am. And the money to buy them.

16. Thankful for snow. And snow-days, which I know we are going to have tomorrow. RIGHT? RIGHT? For all that is holy, please! Teachers everywhere are on their knees BEGGING!

17. Ugg boots. And for places in New Jersey that clean your brand-new, muddy Ugg boots when a certain Malamute puppy jumps on them. I love you, place in New Jersey.

18. Pumpkin candles.

19. My church, which inspires me with its commitment to community, Biblical scholarship, service, the environment and social justice. Gooooooo MOTA! Sorry you are 19th, meant for you to be earlier but I forgot. Lame.

20. Books. Teaching books, birthing/breastfeeding books, novels. Excellent children's books that inspire my kids to read over and over and over. I'll also throw libraries in there. Teachers would die without libraries. And inter-library loan. And holds. I love me some books.

21. Hiking, camping, swimming, etc. And for living in Oregon, where it is the best place to do these things.

22. Cloth diapers. Best thing to happen to the environment since organic. And I am so thrilled that they are so freaking cute and just as easy to do as 'sposies. Makes me not so guilty of a momma.

23. Hulu.

24. The holidays and holiday breaks. Perk of being in the lowest paid profession that requires a Master degree. So don't be messin' with our breaks. You can't afford what we are truly worth!

25. Am I done? My 25th is - I am thankful this list is done. I like being grateful and all, but my ribs hurt. And my kids are putting on the play-from-hell tomorrow complete with sewn costumes and masks, yet they can't seem to face the audience nor stop themselves from running into each other. Wish us luck.

How am I ever going to breastfeed...

...when just a towel brushing my nipples makes me double over?? Just sayin'. I've always been a huge proponent of breastfeeding (big boo formula (unless there is a medical reason - I'm not a total idiot, people)) but holy moley, if my boobs keep getting bigger and sorer, there is no way that baby is getting anywhere near them. Not going to rest his little Nuggety head on them and CERTAINLY not going to put those little wolverine lips around them.

Will they pop if they get any bigger? I am seriously worried about this! Anytime I take my bra off at night I start moaning and sucking in air like I've stubbed my toe. For those of you who have been lucky (or unlucky) enough to see them in real life (Amy, Becky), you know what I mean. It is getting to the point where my bra plus shirts do nothing to hide my cleavage. I am going to need to take a shopping trip soon (if I ever feel good enough or energetic enough or have any time with school starting TOMORROW AHHHH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT IS SCHOOL ALREADY I AM NOT READY HELP ME!!!) Oooooops. Did that slip out?

I also need more pants or at least a belly band. I have started (yes, at 12 weeks) to need to use a hair thingy to wrap around my pant button. My shirts will last a while yet.

I also must be feeling bad about getting fatter, because I keep having these dreams about McSexy either cheating on me or all of a sudden confessing to all these random liaisons before our romance began almost 8 years ago. If you know my hubband AT ALL, you know that 1) he is probably the last man in the world who would ever cheat and 2) he was a total prude and definitely didn't have anything resembling a sexual fling with anyone before he met me. Actually, you might say he was clueless as to any "thing" any girl had for him and I basically had to hit him over the head with a baseball bat to get him to realize I liked him. So, anyway, I wake up most mornings in a panic...aaaaand then turn over and whisper threats into his ear as to what exactly I will do if I ever hear of any wandering ways. Brahahahahaha.

BUT. I love my baby and Nugget is worth it. Just sayin'.

It is a New Year

1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year? I became a teacher!

2. What was the single most challenging thing that happened? Finishing grad school to become a teacher! Mostly those darn work samples that I thought were almost going to kill me! Plus all the drama from grad school was emotionally taxing.

3. What was an unexpected joy this past year? Loving teaching 1,000 times more than I ever thought possible.

4. What was an unexpected obstacle? Not being able to get pregnant as quickly or as easily as I thought I was going to. I thought by right now, the New Year, I would be several months along. Not so much happening.

5. Pick three words to describe 2009. Challenging, delightful, emotional.

6. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe your 2009 (don’t ask them; guess based on how you think your spouse sees you). Stressful, challenging, tiring.

7. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe their 2009 (again, without asking). Challenging, rewarding, motivating.

8. What were the best books you read this year? Moral Classrooms, Moral Children and Creative Curriculum.

9. With whom were your most valuable relationships? I would say those with my mentor teachers. They were so supportive and there is absolutely no way I would be the reflective and effective teacher I am today without their support and encouragement. I probably wouldn't have been a teacher PERIOD because grad school would have eaten me alive and burped me out!

10. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year? I would say I am slower to anger and more able to see things from different perspectives. Also, as a teacher, I am constantly reflecting on my relationships and how I act towards others. It feels hypocritical to spend hours each day teaching children to be kind and empathetic, how to problem solve and compromise, how to evaluate decisions based on what is equitable and then not implement these things in my life as well.

11. In what way(s) did you grow emotionally? I am trying to become a kinder person. If I am throwing an unnecessary emotional fit with my husband, I am using tools to stop myself, walk away, and revisit the situation after calming down and considering his needs in a RATIONAL MANNER. Disclaimer: I am trying to do this, hardly accomplishing it!

12. In what way(s) did you grow spiritually? Grad school reaffirmed that I can do all things with God's grace! I really didn't have the confidence in myself to think that I could make it through such a tough program, but with His peace and strength was able to. I really relied on and revisited often the idea of being yoked to Jesus - He helped me shoulder my burdens with a yoke custom made for me! Also, I am needing to rely on His peace and patience daily with this whole TTC drama. I am praying for stillness - when and IF God intends us to become pregnant we will, and not before. His plan is greater than mine!

13. In what way(s) did you grow physically? OUT! I am much heavier than this time last year, and that is depressing!

14. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others? I have never been QUICK to judge others (I don't look at people's clothes or appearance and make face value judgments EVER) but I know that I can judge people after coming to know them for having different beliefs than I. I think I became just a smidgen better at withholding judgment this past year. If not that, I at least grew to see the value of reflecting on my already preconceived ideas and attempting to challenge them.

In addition, I developed close girlfriend relationships, something I haven't really been able to do for a long time. I am still cautious and slow moving, but I am thankful for my girlfriends who are accepting, not demanding, and push me out of my comfort zone (you know who you are!)

15. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home? Decorating! I got new cube shelving from IKEA and a new T.V. and it transformed my living room! We also re-tiled our master bath! I love home decorating. It is sort of a problem for me.

16. What was your most challenging area of home management? Meal planning and cooking on a regular basis. We ate out more this year than I can even count. Trying to break out of that habit and devote myself to frugal, clean meals.

17. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year? Facebook and Hulu. Gotta limit those this year!

18. What was the best way you used your time this past year? Teaching and spending time with my husband and dogs.

19. What was the biggest thing you learned this past year? That there is a time and purpose for all things!

20. Create a phrase or statement that describes 2009 for you. I have never been good at "creating" my own quotes, but I do love to borrow! Here is my quote for 2009:

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we may become."

Charles Du Bos

Reflection questions borrowed from Simple Mom.

Thanksgiving...

...or, "Why my class will not be making feathered headdresses this week."

As a teacher, I made a commitment early in my graduate studies to teach "nothing that is wrong." This particularly applies to history, as most of what my generation was raised to believe as historical "fact" is nothing more than Anglo-Saxon/Christian/male tainted accounts of what actually occurred. Rarely are children taught the "real" version of history, or even that there ARE diverse accounts of our nation's (and the world's) historical events. This is never more true than in the case of Thanksgiving.

As a child, I grew up hearing the traditional account of the "pilgrims'" first harvest feast, complete with sweet Squanto, abundant food, and peaceful relations between the new settlers and the Native Americans. We made "Indian" vests out of paper bags, paraded in headdresses, and acted out the pleasure of the indigenous people as they were invited to share in the pilgrim's bounty.

Ha. Ha. Hahahahahahaha.

All this was well-intentioned, I am sure. Sometimes, if the teacher was REAL liberal, we even read a Native American poem or two about the earth. This was a more well-rounded, balanced approach to teaching about Thanksgiving, you see.

Well, times have changed. This Thanksgiving, in my school, we are not celebrating the European's encroachment onto the Wampanoag's land. We are not celebrating the 95% of all Native's who were wiped out by smallpox and other forms of European biological warfare. We are not celebrating the fact that those in power have altered these peoples' story and that millions of children grew up with a skewed and dangerous view of history.

Instead, in my class, we are talking about Stone Soup. We are talking about how alone, we have little, but together, we can feed us all. We are talking about distribution of resources, sharing, and how to confront selfishness and greed. We are talking about bread, and families, and how each culture has something to offer one another. And yes, we are thinking about what we are Thankful for, with no mention of "Indians" and pilgrims.

If you are a teacher, or a parent, please read the resources below before your next Thanksgiving re-telling. Question what and how you are celebrating. We have much to be thankful for, but how are we introducing that concept to our children? Are we using an archaic, false and skewed tale at the expense of real history? Who is hurt by this perpetuating myth? Is there a way you can introduce Thanksgiving (the true story) and encourage children to have a reflective, grateful heart without glorifying what was essentially the beginning of genocide?

1. Oyate.org – Deconstructing the Myths of Thanksgiving: http://www.oyate.org/resources.html

2. Resource to find out about the indigenous people that lived here before colonization: http://www.native-languages.org/states.htm

3. Kids FAQ about Native Americans: http://www.native-languages.org/kidfaq.htm#1

4. A great list of children’s books (organized by age) : http://www.native-languages.org/children-books.htm

5. Rethinking Our Schools: Myths and Misgivings: http://www.rethinkingschools.org/archive/24_01/24_01_thanksgiving.shtml

6. Webquest on the first Thanksgiving (this gives a more accurate, balanced approach without highlighting the violence between the Wampanoag's and Europeans. http://www.plimoth.org/education/olc/index_js2.html#

Hiatus

I am full time teaching now, taking over for the preschool class at my school. A bit stressful, to say the least! I have started a new blog for the class. You can find it here at The Daily Dolphin.

Until I get back on my feet and into a routine, I am afraid Medical Miracle will have to be suspended for a while. Not long, maybe a few weeks, maybe even less. Just wanted to let all y'all know that though I am gone, I am not a blogger slacker! Keep up with my class at The Daily Dolphin! They are so cute!

Raising Readers and Writers!

As a teacher, I am pretty much obsessed with literacy and books!

I always tell everyone who asks that the MOST important thing you can do for their child is read to him or her all day, every day. I'm not talking about restraining your child in a chair with picture books for hours on end, but instead making the most of authentic opportunities to talk to your child about print, how words are used to convey meaning, and the various ways people use print to communicate with one another.


Discuss signs, notes or cards, cookbooks, grocery lists, and even your blog (or texting!) with your child. Show them that writing and reading is something that is useful and fun all throughout your day. Talk about print as you read it or write it - "Oh! Since I am starting a new word in my card to Grandma, I am going to make sure to leave a space between the word I just wrote and my new word to make it easier for Grandma to read! This is what real writers do, and you can do it, too, in your own writing! Just like me!" "Since there is a question mark at the end of this sentence, I know that Daddy is asking a question in his note, and I should make my voice sound like this when I read it!"


Of course, there is nothing more special than the tried-and-true before bedtime reading session. My dad read to my sister and I every single night, and it was not only bonding time with my family, but also instilled in my sister and I the love and value of reading. My mom swears it is how come we are so smart and well-adjusted (ahem!) and actually research supports her claims. Reading aloud to your child is THE single most important thing a parent can do to ensure that your child becomes a successful reader.

I can go on and on about literacy and probably will have several more posts on the topic over the course of my lifetime, but for now, I leave you with a few resources. While perusing the NAEYC (National Association for the Education of Young Children) website, I came across this article from the American Academy of Pediatrics. It lists some good guidelines for selecting books for your children depending on their age, and encourages parents to be purposeful in their selection of literature. For you medical folk out there, there are also some neat links on how pediatricians can support literacy and even some pre-designed handouts to give to patients' parents.

Secondly, there is this book called the Read Aloud Handbook my mom gives EVERY mom-to-be. She says it is the mother of all books, and will literally save your life as a parent. It gives you a list of the best books, as well as ways to encourage reluctant readers. It is a must own!

Now, do as I say and your child will never make a poor choice or disappoint you. HA!

A new beginning!

School starts tomorrow! I am so excited to get into the swing of things but also nervous because it will be my first year with my own classroom! At least I have a few months to get into the swing of things! I co-teach until November, when another teacher goes on maternity leave until after Spring Break! My school is what I call high-demand. They expect ALOT of their teachers, and I hope I meet those expectations! I met alot of the parents tonight, both in my Kinder and Preschool rooms, and they are all so sweet and supportive. I knew some of them from last year, but not all. I love the ELC because they have such a strong community. If you would like to follow along with what we are up to in our classroom, you can check out the school website here. You can go on the blog page, and the first few months I'll be in Kinder. Click on Aja's blog. The second half of the year I will be taking over Laurel's class, so you can click on that link to see my preschoolers!

Being with the kiddos tonight really made me want a baby so bad. Those ovulation strips ran out with no indicator of ovulating! What does that mean? Does it mean that I didn't ovulate? Or that I ovulated late or am ovulating now? I am not someone who can handle delayed gratification very well. When I decide to do something, I want it to happen right away. So, the sooner I get pregnant, the better. Knowing God, though, He'll use this pregnancy thing as a way to make me grow in patience... Not my strong point!

I'll leave you with this cartoon, clearly and accurately illustrating the difference between me (the newbie) and old fogies who need to retire so the rest of my friends can get jobs! Enjoy!

P.S. Tomorrow will mark the return of Teaching Tidbits - the insightful, hilarious or just plain STRANGE things kids say!

Affirmation Anteater

Okay. So on Wednesday I am going to go out to my old elementary school to be observed by the principal there and also to observe in one of my parent's friend's classroom. Cheri is a phenomenal teacher so I can't wait to watch her in action again (I did my undergraduate practicums with her) with the lense of a budding teacher. I would LOVE to teach in Cedaroak, as West Linn is a very constructivist district and shares a similar teaching philosophy. I am going to do this infectious disease lesson that I did with my third graders and it is so engaging and challenging and very hands-on. I am a little freaked out about getting observed, but lately I have felt that I will end up right where I am supposed to be next year and I have become more peaceful with it. I think part of my restfulness comes from knowing that I truly am an excellent teacher. I am not one to talk about my accomplishments or share them with anyone but Jason or my family, because I sometimes feel that if I do talk about my successes it might make others feel bad so I generally keep them to myself. But this is my blog, and we talked in our class last week about developing "Affirmation Anteaters" and trying to recognize our strengths and gifts, so I am going to spill a bit and if people don't like it, they don't have to read! So there.

I know I am an excellent teacher because I feel in my deepest heart that I am. I feel like I bring an energy and passion and happiness to teaching that I don't see many teachers have. I am happy EVERY DAY and thankful to be around my kids, and I think that they feel this and know it. I also take the time to care about my students and love on them and find out what is going on in their heads and hearts, and to me, that is priceless. They know that I love them and think they are hilarious and truly enjoy being with them and I think it makes them feel valued.

I also know I am a good teacher because others have told me. I have been told that I am an excellent teacher over many years and by many people, but this year has solidified this and internalized it for me. I have had trouble believing this in the past, but having enough teachers and principals and professors this year tell me that I am exceptionally strong has some how made me believe it must be true. I am so hard on myself and even though I know I am a good teacher, I beat myself up continually if little things go wrong or kids miss a concept. Anyway, I am already getting uncomfortable writing this, so I have said as much as I will for right now. Maybe I'll elaborate later...

Working vs. Staying at Home

To tell you the truth, I have always been the sort of person to judge families who prefer to put their children in daycare over staying at home to care for them. I have never cared which spouse stayed home, but I always have felt it essential that at least one parent stay at home (at the very least part time) to care for the children during early childhood. This value has been instilled in me since I was very young, and I feel even more strongly after receiving a both a BA in early childhood and now my masters degree in early childhood and elementary ed. Early childhood is THE most critical time of development and what happens to children when they are young will shape the rest of their life. It seems extreme and it is (I have the research to prove it). To put a infant or toddler in a daycare where the ratio is 1 to 4 or 5 is ridiculous. There is no way, and I know, as I have taught infants and preschoolers in a daycare setting, that children can get the stimulation and personal care they need in that sort of environment. In addition, most daycare providers have little or no education in childhood development (or education period) or how to make meaningful educational experiences for young children. I can see getting a nanny with alot of experience/education or allowing a family member or close friend to help out with childcare, but that is about it. I just don't believe that the additional money from having two incomes makes up for someone else raising your child. No amount of money is worth your child not getting developmentally and educationally what he or she needs at such a critical time. I have always thought that if two people are so career driven that their jobs will be more important than staying at home, then they shouldn't have children. Period.

That said, I have never loved anything like I do teaching. I mean, I have loved my family and Jason and my animals more, but not a job or even activity. Even theatre or triathlons I have not loved like I do teaching. It is fascinating to me, challenging, fun, extremely stimulating and I am happy everyday. Now, I am not sure how I will feel when I have my babies, but I am guessing that it will be very painful for me to leave teaching as it is something I am very, very good. It will also be devestating to leave my children with anyone but my parents or a very close friend. Even a nanny, I don't think I could handle it. I am thinking that my best bet will be to work part-time and have my child with my mother or girlfriend the other days. If I made comparable money and he wasn't going to med school, then he would stay home, as I think he could easily give up engineering (but not medicine) to raise children. However, I will NEVER make anywhere near his salary so I am the natural person to cut my hours or stop working. Plus, I know WAAAY more about babies and development than he does, but you can bet he will be very educated on all of that before we actually have kids. I digress.

The point of this post is that, I can finally understand why some women have a hard time giving up their careers for their children. Especially in a career like teaching where you influence children every day and affect change that reaches beyond what you can imagine. Pretty important purpose, don't you think? Of course, what good is helping out other people's children if you can't meet the needs of your own? But it all comes down to this: What do you do if you have two loves?