Woody Goes to the Vet

Woody is my Pit Bull/Mastiff mix. He lives with my mom and dad because they refused to give him to me when I got married and moved out. My mom's exact words -

"There will be a custody battle if you try to take him."

Um... okay. Won't press it.

Recently, Woody has had a string of misfortunes that has left him highly debilitated. His vertebrae are out of place from whiplash (my mom totaled my dad's car with Woody and Diesel inside - note to self, ALWAYS put the dogs in their car seats). He tore his CCL (cruciate ligament in his knee - it is like the ACL in humans), probably from Diesel regularly running into him like a linebacker. His front leg is out of wack and he has hip displasia in one hip and arthritis all over.

Poor baby.

Despite looking like Elmer Fudd/a beached manatee, Woody really is THE sweetest dog ever, and it is so hard to see him in pain and suffering.

Instead of surgery and more traditional treatment, my mom decided to take an exercise/physical therapy based approach, coupled with prolotherapy. There is this wonderful facility by where we live called Back on Track. They developed a whole course of therapy for Woody, including hydrotherapy. He had his first treatment today, and I'll let Woody tell you the rest.

First, they put this stupid vest on me. It was not down or chenille (the fabrics I traditionally wear). First indication that this was NOT going to be a good day.


Then, I had to go in this secret torture chamber box with a lock that I didn't know how to undo. That is right - it was difficult for even an expert baby-lock-buster like me to find an escape route. Bad omen number two.


They put me in the secret torture chamber box and turned on a secret waterfall. The box filled with water and I thought I was going to drown. It was very unsafe.


This is me near death in that secret torture chamber. Did I mention I almost drowned?




To make matters worse, they made me walk in the secret chamber. The bottom of that secret chamber moved! This also was not safe for my body. I was never meant for strenuous activity.

Finally, they let me out. My mom and dad don't know this, but I am NEVER going back there again.