(My dear friend Amy bought Noah this doll, so that he would always remember and know his older sibling).As I reflect on the past year, I am able to see God working through all that happened. I have received countless emails and messages from friends and friends of friends and anonymous readers, thanking me for blogging about my miscarriage and all the messiness that went along with it, and sharing their story, because they too were experiencing a loss and the isolation and shame and fear that it brings. It is amazing how God is always able to take the horrific and traumatizing and sad and somehow bring abundant blessings and HOPE! If I was able to make the journey of miscarriage a little easier for even one woman or family, than my pain (and public dissection of it) was worth it. Looking back, I can also see now that the experience of my loss strengthened me for the pregnancy that was to come, a pregnancy that would take all of me (physically, emotionally and mentally) but that I knew through it all was worth it for Noah.
But that does not change that today and this week, as I am loving and adoring my second baby, I also am still grieving and missing my first.
Thinking of you and your babies today. It is definitely true what you say about loss fortifying us for what is to come. I know that both infertility and miscarriages did that for me and Mike. I'm glad you have commemorated the day...in some ways I wish I had done that too. Now I don't even remember...
ReplyDeleteHugs!